Category Archives: Malcolm Chisholm

Under Orders

Friends and readers.

We at Pilton Sucks enjoy a sporting wager and to that end we offer up the runners and riders for the Edinburgh North and Leith constituency as the holder of this seat, our good friend and regular sucks reader Malcolm Chisholm has all but announced he will be stand down come the next Scottish Parliamentary elections.

Malcolms imminent announcement will kick start a furious blood and guts race to grab the Nomination. At this point we have to say that our mate Malcolm is well thought of  and will in human terms be a hard act  to follow.

So let’s have a little fun and speculate who might be a candidate or emerge as the official candidate with a wafer thin majority to defend. One name comes out immediately and that of course is our old friend and regular sucks reader, Harvey Nics account holder and designer darling Lesley Prada Hinds. Now it’s commonly known within the comrades closeted world that there is no love lost between Malcolm and Prada, but there’s no stopping our Lesley and a mere detail like that will only make her more determined to bring a curtain down on all her other parliamentary losses and try and bag a potential winner. Pilton Sucks makes Lesley’s chances at 4-1

Next up we have Leith Councillor and another sucks reader Gordon Munro. Privately Gogsie is frustrated at being overlooked for the heady heights of Holyrood and is bound to be a runner in this race. Apart from some slimy activities gogsie must fancy his chances and we offer our mate at 7-2

Next up is our good friend Cammy cuddly Day. Cammy is the new Forth ward dog fouling Czar and what more do you need on your CV than that of dog shit supremo. Cammy is ambitious and that’s good but he will have to contend with Pradas wrath and that may be a nomination to far. Cammy is quietly building himself ground support and we have to say with his showing at the local elections he must be in with a shout. We offer our dog fouling Czar at 5-2 and early market favourite.

Of course there may be more comrades interested in this soon to be vacated seat and with that we add that our odds may fluctuate from time to time. We also add that ala Alex Ferguson Malcolm may have a say in who gets the nomination. There are a few hurdles left in this race yet.

Back We come

Hello friends and readers.

It’s been a while but we are back to report all that is going on plus the juicy bits.Some of our old friends are here and we have some new ones, lucky us. Our old friend and compulsive sucks reader Lesley prada Hinds is still here, just like an old penny, keeps turning up, and the Chair of everything committee has her sights set on the Leith and North Edinburgh seat currently occupied by another of our old friends and readers Malcolm Chisholm, who we are told on the quite will retire before the next election, allowing the comrades to slug it out for the right to lose the seat at the next election. But dear friends that is a little way off and Prada will have some competition for the upcoming vacancy, so we will watch this one with interest.  It’s where to begin as we are spoilt for choice. We could start with another of our old friends the current Neighbourhood manager and best dressed man in Pilton Peter[fuck democracy]Strong, who with his minions have been slowly dismantling the Neighbourhood partnership in the name of democracy of course and wiping away any accountability possible, but we will hold our enthusiasm for that one till later. We could of course talk about the scandal of the £85,000 for a private car park in Muirhouse but we will contain ourselves for the moment. Our in tray is bulging with goodies and our readers are thirsty for news and we will deliver warts and all. The promised new health center in Muirhouse, or should we say the vanishing new health center in Muirhouse. The Shopping center scandal and the monies wasted, but again we will return to that. And Peter what happened to the proposed scheme to have cctv cameras on the walkways, something we are reliably informed was well supported by the community but was binned, so do we want safety or a private car park, answers on a postcard please.

We have new friends and readers to delight you with and a cast Cecil B DeMille would have died for. Enter the gladiator and peoples pretend friend all bright eyed and bushy tailed Ross McEwan who has been giving us all his vision of an outdoor swimming pool in Granton, yes friends an outdoor swimming pool in Granton and to top it all and send you into fits of laughter it has the priceless name of Granton sur mer ,   you just couldn’t make that up. Our friend Ross has been creeping his way round the Community trying to gather support for this hair brained scheme, and friends he even managed to screw £10,000 from the Lottery fund to have one of these infamous consultation exercises, still waiting with bated breath Ross and we are sure the Lottery people are as well.

Ah so much to say A new community centre to replace the old one down sunny Royston Way,  yes good news and long overdue until you try to get access or a cup of tea, both of which seem to be difficult to do, so we will watch that one also. Just on that point the new Centre is now managed by Lydia[can't stand the punters] Markam, hope we spelt that right let us know Lydia if we didn’t. And let us not forget Spartans who have a brand new purpose built facility up in Pilton Drive and a wonderful facility it is, we just have one question for the moment. This facility has Community Status which of course is the gateway for monies and income streams, why then does the Community only get lip service from this Community Academy. Douglas Samual is the current manager and maybe he has one or two questions to answer along with his pal and Chair Craig Graham, we have an immediate view split the club and the academy and have a Chairperson for the academy and one for the football club, saves confusion and we have the very person in mind.

That’s it for now folks but stay with us and read on. Pilton Sucks is back and not before time.